My New found Strength

I have been working in the Call Center Industry for more than two years now. During the first year of me working on my chosen career, I had so much fun. to me it was not work anymore, it was more of a playground. Everything was so easy back then, but not anymore. After two years, I ask my self. Do I still want to do this? Is it still worth it? I mean seriously? In this job, I had to wake up and start my day when everyone else ends theirs. And I end mine, and everyone starts their day. Funny, because I still do it. The more i think of the reason why I am still going to work, hoping to find new strength. All I get are more reason to quit, to leave and start looking for a new path. A colleague once told me, “Of all the job there is, ours is the best. Because we can help 30-50 person everyday.” And I agreed with her, so I told my self that I will not quit. So I thought I did, but apparently I did not. Why? I was selfish, that’s why. How can I be do a job that no longer excites me? When every time I go to work, I couldn’t wish for anything else but to go home. Then I decided to look back, at my old self. The enthusiastic to work version of me, what does he have then that I do not posses now? Is it the youth? probably not, it was just two years ago! Maybe it was the purpose that I had before, and I think I no longer have it now.I wanted to work before because I wanted to earn more, for my self and for my family. I no longer want to be a burden to them, not that I was.  But I wanted to prove something, to everyone. And specially, to my self. That I can be somebody, or someone. That someday, I will be needed. I had so much reason before, so much more than the hardships this job could throw at me. And I made it! I was able to buy my self clothes, cellphones, etc. I can eat whatever I want to eat and go wherever I want, I became independent. And on top of that, I felt that I was needed. That I am finally a somebody, which is what really matters to me.Finally I knew what I needed, and I have come to realize how to be back in the game. I just need to think of those who needs me, and my own needs as well. My ambition to be an agent before is what drives me to work hard, and now I’m here. I already am an agent, a really good one! But I guess the dreaming does not have to stop, does it? I made it here in two years of ups and downs, of sweat and tears. I can just Imagine what I can become in four more years of hard work, or maybe more! who knows? But I am sure of one thing now. That this life a a big war, and now I only want one thing. Win


where is home?

When i first arrived in manila from bicol I already wanted to go back the moment my foot touched the ground as I step down the bus, I already miss the place that I loved for all my life though I have only been away from home for 12 hours. At that moment every second away from home feels like years, of loneliness. Maybe what I’m more afraid of is I am going to start a new life, and I know that building one is a tough job. Making new friends, trying to live their way.

Eventually I did get a life in the city, it’s very different from the one that I had at the province. Got friends that I already considered part of me. They’re more than I hoped for a friend, too good for me so to say. Dilan, the technology freak, maybe the most updated among all of us when it comes to gadgets, kind, yet not the best parson to mess with. Denz, the sweet one, pretty much like ken. Jay-z, the most humiliated one, but also the most patient among all of us. They’re the people I miss the most.

Now I’m here in bicol, gotta catch up with the life that I left behind, I must say that I missed my life here. Quite boring but The simplicity of life here makes the place unique and truly peaceful.  They say home is where your heart is, In my case, “Where is home?”.

The shortest time; Lifetime

11:49 PM        I’m very tired and I so wanted to sleep but I cant get the proper momentum. My mind is busy, thinking, whew! what a day.

7:00 AM          I woke up, and did my daily morning “rituals”.

8:00 AM          I’m eating breakfast and reviewing all my notes.

8:45 AM          I’m Doing the laundry, most of which are mine.

11:00 AM        I was preparing lunch.

12:00 AM        I’m eating lunch in a hurry because I have a class at 1:30 and I still have to bathe.

1:30-4:30 PM       I’m at School, attending my classes hoping not to have a failing grade on our quiz.

4:40 PM       I was heading for home, walking as usual. Then some sort of commotion caught my attention, curiosity got me first than caution so I tried to peek on the “subject” of the whole commotion. I saw an old lady, laid on the pavements floor, I just couldn’t get a full view of her because of the crowd in front of me. Is the lady dead of unconscious? I don’t know yet. Then a man shouted “patay na ‘to” (translated, “she’s dead”) then the man stood, giving me full sight of the poor old lady. Then i recognized her finally, she’s the vendor that sells cigarettes, candies, soda and stuff near my school. Then an ambulance stopped, a man came out running, and turned out to be the lady’s son. When he knew that his mother is dead he started shouting his sorry and I should have I should not have done things. Too bad, her mother cant hear all of it anymore, he should have done it when he had the time. Then I left the scene and headed for home.

11:49 PM        I made a vow, that I will never let any opportunity slip[ off my hands, and that I will make things right this time. I’ll show the people that I care for how much they mean to me, how much I love them. Life is too short, and I don’t want to live my life in regrets. That I will live everyday of my life as if it were my last. We only live once, so we should do everything that we want to do now because tomorrow, it may all be too late.

If there is anything that I have learned from all of this things, it’s the essence of time and the value of life.

See the brighter side of everything…

“To see a world in a grain of sand, and beauty in a wild flower. Hold infinity in the palm of your hand, and Eternity in  an hour”. -William Blake

It was my college professor who gave me this quote, (it sounded more of a puzzle to me).  I thought how the heck can you see a “WORLD” in a grain of sand? Why would I choose seeing beauty in a wild flower over a rose or an orchid? And for the size of my palm, Eternity won’t fit in. And how in the world can I appreciate Eternity in an hour? Then I thought whoever wrote that quote must be nuts. Over the time, as I grew older and more mature, I started seeing life in a different angle, I tried thinking over the quote that my professor gave me. And suddenly the quote that I thought is pointless all made sense to me.

The quote is all about being optimistic, to see the brighter side of everything. We couldn’t possibly get everything that we want, or see results as we planned. But instead of being sad over the things that we didn’t get, let’s be happy over the things that we got. And if you loose something, that’s OK, remember that everything happens for a reason, just count all the things that is still in your possession. The keywords are: Contentment, Hard-work, Patience, Perseverance, and Faith.

Your life is like a bag, no matter how big your bag is time will come that it will be full. And when you want something else you have to let go or throw few things from your bag just to give space for it. It’s not wrong to be ambitious, but being greedy is.

Remember the law of motion “In every action there is an equal but opposite reaction”.

what is love? « Bluefireball21’s Weblog

what is love? « Bluefireball21’s Weblog

what is love?

What is love?

 I couldn’t count the times I was asked with this question. Just last night, I talked to a friend and I don’t know exactly what happened, but we just came up with that topic. I told him that Love for me is just a state of mind, Physical Attraction (“libog”). Some geniuses just made up the word to justify their being  horny towards the opposite sex. Personally, I prefer someone telling me “I Love You” than “I want to fuck with you”, though I don’t believe in  it, It sounds better.

What my friend doesn’t know is that I believe in Love. In fact I have strong faith in it above anything in this world. I just hid it because I am afraid, I become weak and vulnerable whenever I’m in-love. And the worst part of the story is I am most vulnerable from the one that I love. You are only making it so much easier for them to hurt you.

Some say that Love is like gambling, you can win or loose everything. that loosing is part of the risk you have take if you want to win. But isn’t it possible to be in-love without getting burned?

Maybe I was just being coward, or maybe I haven’t met the ONE for me yet. Maybe I just need the right reason to take the risk of getting burned.

  will you take the risk with me?

Why am I doing this?

At first I was hesitant to open a blogging account or something,  I thought it was just a waste of time and money, I have plenty of things to be busy with. This blog is not posted for me to be known,  Its main objective is to share my views and opinion on a lot of things. I’m a very articulate person, I like intelligent conversations, And for me this is the best way  to communicate to other people in all parts of the world.

In my next entry, I will be discussing some of the worlds concern like issues on environment,social and political issues, etc. I hope all who reads this will visit my account again and participate in the discussion.